Chapter 1: Introduction
It is not possible for you to use the tool that you don’t have to work and if you even have it, if you don’t have the knowledge it takes to handle it, you will destroy both the tools and what you are working on.
The first love of entering into a marriage expires and then you migrate into a greater one which ought to sustain the marriage and if you do not have it, when faced in the days of adversities, there’s bound to be a breaking and divorce.
Marriage is interesting but it is something that is not by power nor by might but by the help of the Holy Spirit if you choose to let Him help you. There are things that the husband and the wife know that the children and others do not know. This world is not a perfect place; when one thinks it is peaceful, before you will know it, trouble comes and if you have not the tools it takes to stand at that point in time, it is bound to crash. Jesus said “watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation:” (Matt. 26: 41a)
Marriage is likened to a garden that you find yourself and if you do not maintain it, it is not possible for you to enjoy it. Getting married is not all enough, there is one thing to dress your garden (marriage) and another thing to maintain the garden (marriage) that you have dressed. The major tool you need to dress and maintain your marriage is the word of God coupled with knowledge (common sense –knowledge of life) and grace; then, you will be able to exhibit and put into practice what is expected of you to keep your marriage.
There are a lot of make –ups one needs to do personally outside the physical make-up because, when the physical make-up is watched out, then your true beauty will pronounce. As one gets his or herself prepared for the marriage, he or she also needs to prepare in character. How long you’ll stay in the marriage will determine who you are and your input so far. There is one thing for one to tolerate; tolerance has limitations. When tolerance expires, you’ll begin to count his or her weakness. One should understand that both parties have weakness and the weakness is not a sign of failure but if you recognize the strength of God and ask for His help; He will show up to aid you on and on.
There can’t be a successful marriage without the presence of God in that marriage but if the presence of God is in it, and both do consider God, then they will be able to overcome their challenges. If one is considering God and the other does not, then, there is bound to be disagreement without quick reconciliation. In marriage, if there will be peace and true love, not just the love on the bed or for what is coming from the pocket, then , you have to place God first in all things.
The first attack that satan attacked man is the attack of their marriage. What made Eve to submit to satan is attention. In marriage and out of marriage, you don’t need to pay attention to all things. The greatest weapon that the devil uses in marriage is the weapon of deception and if we give him that attention he seeks, he destroys the marriage but if that marriage must be successful, the one needs to pay attention to the HolySpirit.
You cannot fail God’s test by his grace
If your heart is made up
To please God, to obey him.
God clothed man with His glory but out of ignorance which is by choice of man, they lost it. (Gen 3: ). When you by sight find a wife, and you took yourself to the altar, and the man of God joined you together, when trouble comes, you’ll cry o God but the question is, was it God that joined you? You can only blame God over what He tells you to do but to those who by sight found theirs, they have no right to blame Him. (Prov. ).
Whatsoever is joined together in the physical must first of all be joined together in the spirit and you don’t find such by sight, you find them by insight. Not every marriage that is taken to the altar that is of God and to that which is of God asunder will not enter.
Can God separate marriage?
Now the question is- Who ordained it? Was it by God’s consent? Did both of them enquire from God and they heard clearly that they should move on? Every ordained marriage of is kept by God, He does anything to keep it but if it is of man (sight), God shouldn’t be blame when it’s separated.
Marriage is not like clothes that we change anywhere or anytime; but because of mistakes that man makes, they now change marriage like they change clothes. Marriage is not just what we should rush into by sight, the reason we need to go by insight, it is because, and it is a life time experience. Marriage wither by sight or by insight has challenges but that which is of insight, has more prevailing grace to overcome it because it is divine.
Marriage by human choice (sight) is sometimes difficult to break away (separate) from it but if you don’t consider the pain in breaking away from it, but make u-turn where you need to (if God interrupts), you will be the one to say ‘God I thank you’.
The true character of a man is not known until something happens and that is why we need to go for insight.
We can desire by choice. When we desire by sight which is of human, it does not tally by God’s choice which is by insight. If you don’t position yourself for trimming, your appearance will not give glory to God; if you do not position yourself for God to prune you before He show-cases you, your appearance will not give glory to God. If we do not give ourselves (submit ourselves to the will of God), take the word of God serious and we decide to go the way we are, our marriage will be a one of disgrace.
“Na man dey marry, nor be boy” in other words, boys don’t marry; only men do. You can be a man physically and inwardly, you are a boy (not being matured). It takes maturity to become a man and not by age. A man with true knowledge handles matters wisely but boys, take their matters that they are suppose to handle by themselves to their parents because of immaturity. This also is applicable to the females.
There are qualities we need to have that will make us to be a true woman or man and if we don’t have them, the, you are still a girl or a boy. It is not because we have children or the number of children we have that makes you to be a man or a woman. Let our marriages be of God and let it not be based on material things.
If you do not go by insight and you have someone who has a vision, the one without insight who has not the vision, will deter the vision because, the one with the vision will be working towards fulfilling the vision and the without the vision who has not the knowledge of the vision for lack of insight, will be going the other way; because they do not have the same vision, the vision may not stand.
You need true knowledge to enter marriage, and
Also, to remain or continue in it.
The reason why you should go by insight:-
• Enter into the scanning bucket: – to enter into the scanning bucket is to go for spiritual check-up. It takes going into the realm of the Spirit (seeking the face of God through prayers) to properly know or diagnose if the marriage you are about to enter into is of God or self. When you find out that it is of God, you can go ahead but if you find out that it is not of God, what you need to do is to QUIT without second thoughts but if you consider it and go ahead, you have on your own fallen into a programmed trap set for you and then, when it breaks up, who are you to blame? God or yourself?